Opinion: RELATIONSHIPS

By Jan Evrard

We may not realize it, but we are connected to the people, places and things around us, but often  fail to build relationships with them. As this pertains to people, this failure may come from a  place of fear and misunderstanding, or simply because we don’t know where to start.

Several years ago, I was involved in Faith in Indiana, and it was at one of our events that I made  a comment that drew the attention of Diane Rogers. Now I didn’t know Diane at the time, but I  knew that whatever I said connected with her, and she wanted to talk more. I had no idea that  our first conversation would result in taking on the role of secretary/treasurer of Oxford  Community Association a few months later.

Now being an older white woman who did not live in or even near the Oxford neighborhood, I  had to look closely at how my involvement would be received. There was definitely a need for a  secretary/treasurer, no one else was stepping up, and I was willing to do it. However, I understood  that I had to be willing to listen and learn about the history of the neighborhood association, as  well as get to know the residents. I could not come in with the attitude that I knew what was  best, but had to ask how I could be of service.

I learned that the Oxford community is a diverse group of folks who are proud to call their  southeast neighborhood home. Many grew up there, attended nearby schools, bought homes and  retired in the community. I learned that the Oxford Community Association was established in  1972 by property owners to promote safety, cleanliness and beautification to the area, and  support local businesses. They are also the only neighborhood association in Fort Wayne to own  their own building. This is a great asset but the building is in need of renovation, which has been  an ongoing challenge for the association. However, there are many challenges living in any  marginalized community, and it is easy to be an ally when I am able to go home to my  neighborhood with fewer challenges and suffering. So how do I make sense of this?

Father Richard Rohr describes solidarity with those who suffer in this way. “We must not  separate ourselves from the suffering of the world. When we are close to those in pain their need  evokes love in us. Very few of us make the choice to just decide to be loving, but someone has to  ask it of us. We have to place ourselves in situations with people who are not like us, outside our  systems of success and security, so we can read life from another perspective. The needs we  witness will pull us toward love, toward generosity and compassion.”

Although I don’t feel everyone living in the Oxford neighborhood is “suffering”, I do feel that it  is a community lacking in the type of resources that allows one to simply find a safe haven to  reset and restore. That is why renovation of our community building is so important. We have  the ability to be this hub that can be this safe haven but also a meeting place, a resource center, a  space for education, yoga and fitness, youth programs, employment fairs, training, rental space  and much more. There is so much potential, we are just lacking the funds to get it done.

However, we have been helped along the way with like minded folks like architect Zach  Benedict of MKM Architecture and Design, who donated his time to meet with us, see our

vision, and draw some amazing plans for the building. When we had an idea for Oxford Park in  the small green space next to the building, Design Collaborative stepped up and made us a project celebrating their 30 years in business, donating thousands in material and labor, and  making friends along the way. These are people who understand the power of relationships with  people outside of their own community, and very intentionally choose to be compassionate and  generous. We can’t thank them enough.

Building new relationships is hard work, but it is important work, and I invite you to work beside  others who are working to build a community where all residents are given an opportunity to  thrive. Visit us at www.oxfordcommunityassociation.org.