Environmental Pull
By Key Kessens
FWIS Contributing Writer
External Influences
Since childhood outside forces have been influencing us. These experiences shape our mindset as we get older. A factor we don’t consider is how our money mindset was influenced by people & situations in our past. Our money mindset is also heavily determined by our childhood.
Think about it in terms of emotions. If you grew up around emotionally immature parents, you most likely are also emotionally immature because you learned that from those childhood influences. That was your first experience with emotional maturity, so you thought that was an appropriate situation or the right way to handle those experiences. Now think about it in financial terms. If you grew up around financially responsible parents, you are most likely to be financially responsible too.
Society shoves ‘the broke mindset’ in our brains to make us believe we are less than for not having more money. The issue is that a lot of people don’t get to experience the luxury of being financially stable because of their financial mindset. The negative financial experiences in our childhood (such as poverty, job loss, and the lack mindset) can carry on to our adulthood. Then, society shames people for financial struggles instead of providing the education or helping to solve the issues.
When we choose to internalize these outside messages from society and our childhood, it can lead us to make unhelpful decisions. We may be experiencing financial instability because of a lack of education. Welcome to part 2 of the “Get Good with Money” by Tiffany Aliche book review series. I recently learned that our environmental influences pull us to make our financial decisions.
Cosequential Patterns
How does our environment impact our financial decisions? When forces combine together they create our patterns. Our external influences negatively affect our finances when their habits become our own. For example, being in poverty in childhood, struggling with a lack mindset, financial instability now, and on top of that feeling shameful for your situation can create the habit of impulsive spending. All of these forces together cause you to want to make it look like you are not in a financial struggle, so you choose to buy materialistic things that you really can’t afford.
That is definitely an example of a bad habit that has negative consequences. Since you are already low on money, buying expensive materialistic items doesn’t help you whatsoever. The consequence is staying in financial instability. A positive habit would yield reinforcements, or beneficial outcomes.
Okay, how do I break my toxic habits? Great question! The first step in creating new habits is being aware of your current ones. You can’t change what you don’t know. Reflect on consistent behaviors you find yourself doing. For instance, you realize that you constantly go out to eat at expensive restaurants when you also have plenty of bills that you struggle to keep up with.
The next step is to figure out where this habit comes from? With the same example as before, you think about how your mom always took you out to eat when things were tight as a luxury. You carried that habit on into your adulthood.
Now that you recognize the root of your behavior, ask yourself how it makes you feel when you do it now. Don’t be afraid if you feel emotions that are considered “negative” or “bad.” These emotions are actually trying to tell you TO STOP DOING WHATEVER HABIT IS TRIGGERING THIS EMOTION. Ignoring your feelings won’t make them go away, so redirect them to take them as a sign to listen to yourself.
Being aware of your financial habits gives you the incentive to change them. After recognizing your patterns and where they came from you can break them because you are aware. Respond to the negative habit with one that invokes you to feel secure in your financial patterns. Release the old pattern with a new, favorable one.
Strong Financial Voice
The real trick to replacing old habits is getting connected with your inner strength. In this instance we will be using your inner strength to establish your financial voice. Once you know your financial voice, you’ll feel more in control of your decisions. Therefore, you will be able to confidently make conscious decisions that align with the new habits you want to put in place.
This may seem hard, but it’s actually not as hard as it sounds. Tiffany Aliche advises us to, “start with visualizing a new, improved version of yourself,” (Aliche 22). Of course, make the focus be around a new one that is good with money. Take parts of what you see and like from others, then make it your own. Then think about the new financially whole you and what behaviors you would do to get to that level.
Once you envision this new financially stable you, all you have to do is take action. Remember those habits that you do and stick to them. Keep that image of the new you in mind too because that’s going to motivate you to establish your strong financial voice. If you are trying to save up for a car and not spend more than you make, going out to dinner with your friends at fancy restaurants everyday is not the best decision to make. You are in control of yourself, use your financial voice to say “no.”
Internal Influences
Now that you realize where your money influences may be negative and you envisioned a new financially whole you, reframe your mindset. I know that was a lot of information to take in, & some of it seems negative, but once you are fully aware of your unhelpful patterns (where they came from), they do get easier to break. Especially with your strong financial voice. Take control of money, not the other way around. Make it work hard for you & remember that new you that’s good with money.
What I mean by reframing your mindset is take your new financially whole self & take steps towards becoming that person in the present. Let go of old negative influences & patterns to replace them with new experiences to reshape your perspective & behaviors. Let your financial voice & the new you that’s good with money guide you through this journey.
Also, don’t forget to shut out society. The shameful, judgmental view around money does not apply to you because we have a strong financial voice. Nobody can knock me down because I’m taking control of my finances. Follow the habits that reinforce your behaviors, not what everybody else is doing. Everybody is not gonna have the same journey to become financially whole, don’t let society tell you otherwise. Go at your own pace. Follow your internal influences, or what makes you feel good.
Another helpful tip is to surround yourself with uplifting people that are working towards similar goals. The key to reshaping your environmental pulls is to let go of negative external influences & replacing them with positive external influences that fuel you internally. For example, trying to save, save, save around people who only convince you to spend more than you have would be harder to do because that’s not a positive influence.
My advice to you, shut out all those negative external influences & listen to your internal influences. Recognize where those negative influences could have impacted your financial habits. Remember to be grateful that you are aware of what you can now change because you know what it is & the root cause of where it came from. Envision a new financially whole you, & think about the behaviors that person would do. Take control of your financial voice by using your inner strength to say “NO” to things you are not able to afford right now. You won’t be struggling financially forever, the only way out of the situation is through, so take charge of your finances today with these tips.
.